October 7, 2011

Why are you so angry, Laura?

Yes, I'm angry. I try to keep from seething and spitting, but sure I'm angry. Does that offend you?

You'd be angry, too, if you saw things as I do and saw so many families in needless suffering and confusion. You'd be pissed as hell if you knew that no matter how much good information a parent gets they are comparing it to all sorts of equally authoritative nonsense they're hearing. You'd want to get a sandwich board covered with angry exclamation points if you knew how hard it is to see your beloved child imploding and have no idea what to do.

There are REASONS for anger. Anger is alarm, urgency, frustration. It isn't an inappropriate scene at a nice party - yes, I get angry. Let's talk about it rather than assuming my emotion is the problem.

5 comments:

  1. You anger is not only warranted but a never ending reminder to those of us struggling that this really *is* a big deal. Every time my eating disorder tells me this is not a problem I come back here and see your words; so clear and articulate. The way I imagine my own partner feels when he watches me head into danger I cannot see - and it shocks me back onto the path of truth rather than the path my eating disorder would have me follow.
    What we need is more anger, more alarm, more urgency and more frustration. And far less blame, denial, apology and excuses.

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  2. Laura, Thank you for getting angry. I am also angry, feel the urgency and frustration. Tell me what to do to help. I am your follower. I can't just keep agreeing with everyone and try to make people feel better. We have to challenge the community.
    We NEED a LEADER. Is that you? Caron

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  3. Awww, now: you're just enabling me!

    Seriously, anger is one part of the work and then there's making reasonable goals and getting to work on them.

    Our upcoming conference is the one thing right now that we can DO to move things forward.

    Then there is the ATDT forum, there's the Coffee Breaks, there's the online community, there's information sharing between parents and professionals, and theres each of us getting out there in our communities and SPEAKING UP!

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  4. If you weren't so frustrated and "angry" at the way things are we wouldn't have your important book or the forum you began for support for parents and loved ones.
    I was thinking I could probably write "my chapter" on being a parent faced with this. We tried and stepped away from conventional medicine,AMA, and into full recovery. I know this seemed like my child wasn't as sick. She WAS. She damn near died. Yes, we were blessed, as were you, Laura. People are less interested in how someone like my child beat this because they think it's not at all like their story. I have told it anyway. I believe this disease is curable. I am certain, at the very least, it can be managed out of ones life. Getting people to believe it's possible is frustrating for me too.

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  5. Mary, telling our individual, unique stories is part of changing things - I'm so delighted you are telling yours. Please let me know if I can help in any way - publish at F.E.A.S.T., spread the word on this blog.

    There isn't a single story or narrative or way a family successfully faces this challenge - there are countless ones - and we need to hear as many as possible!

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